When I woke up this morning I made my first entry into my “dream journal”, before this morning I have never written down details of a dream. As I scribbled letters into a mini Moleskine notebook which has found a new home next to my bottom bunk, I was nervous yet invigorated! The nerves were most likely a product of it being my first time… journaling the details of my dream, and the invigoration shot through my veins because I knew I was being obedient. Truthfully, the idea of God speaking to me through my dreams is still stressful, mainly because of how busy my brain already is, but to purposefully deny an avenue of divine conversation is pretty ignorant. My interpretation skills aren’t very polished, so I am still at a loss in the “meaning” of the dream, but it’s interesting enough to pursue, so a new journey awaits!
After I finally jotted down the details, I got out of bed and put on the same clothes I wore yesterday, packed my bible, iPod, and journal and headed to the bus stop; when you live in a village that is less populated than the high school you went to, sometimes an escape is necessary! A few of my friends were also on the bus heading down to Fuengirola for a different adventure but we took the time to eat some breakfast together and then I set off on a day I will never forget. While walking away from my friends, I put both of my earbuds in, selected my ‘Swagger‘ playlist and stepped from normality to reality! Fuengirola isn’t a very big city, it’s hardly a city in comparison to my hometown of Phoenix, but while I’m here, it will do. One thing that Fuengi [our nickname for the city] has that Phoenix doesn’t is the Mediterranean Sea… So, I headed down to the beach, slipped off my vans then my white tube socks, rolled up my jeans until they were slightly shorty than manpris and walked down to the water. The playlist seemed to be a sound track to my heart, mainly because hip-hop music moves my soul more than most “worship” music ever could, but also because most of the time I think Jesus is in charge of the shuffle. As I’m walking parallel with the horizon, my feet taking very firm steps into the sand as the tide rolls past my feet and then gracefully slides back into the mass of water. Certain steps were met with a higher tide than others, getting the legs of my pants wet but not hindering my swag, at all. Every step was like a professional athlete stepping onto their war ground, with purpose and confidence, knowing that I was in the midst of victory.
After about a quarter mile of walking along the tide as if I was the only person on the beach, rapping songs out loud with headphones in, making hand motions as if I was trying to hype a crowd, and strutting as if I actually owned the beach, I stopped… I stopped walking, I stopped singing and I stared out into the Mediterranean Sea. As I stared into the beautiful blue horizon I thought about the day I stood on a beach in Ventura, California with my feet in the Pacific ocean and let the tide rush in and out of a small plastic bag, until the only physical remnants of my mother were fully washed into the ocean. A smile grew on my face as I thought about the journey her ashes have taken throughout the massive body of water that covers the earth. With ‘A Star Is Born’ by Jay-Z ft J. Cole playing in my ears I spoke with confidence, and told my mom that I will marry a good woman, a woman she would get along with and I would raise beautiful little grand-babies, tears started to roll down my cheeks and I closed out this moment by confirming the last promise I made to her, which was, “I will make you proud.” Just before this conclusive moment, DJ Jazzy Jesus switched songs and ‘Coming Home’ by Diddy ft. Skylar Grey made it’s way through my senses! My chest puffed up, and panning my vision from the snow capped Sierra Nevada’s across the horizon of the Mediterranean, I made another proclamation regarding my heart for America and warned my home country from 6000 miles away that a man they’ve never met is but 7 weeks from landing.
If you know anything about my level of confidence, you can imagine how I am walking after these two incredibly freeing and encouraging moments! But, my journey is not yet finished… Continuing in the same direction along the tide, I have an idea that I should run and dive into the ocean, a series of thoughts follow until I find myself walking twenty steps back to the place where that thought originated. I removed the earbuds from my ears, pulled out both earrings at one time, took off my Invisible Children tee, let my jeans hit the sand and I ran with the glory of my green Fruit of the Loom’s into the Sea! My feet took me as far as they could until I had to commit to the full immersion dive, and the water was so cold I came up out of the water barely able to breath due to the shock of the water. Finally catching my breath, I waded around for a couple minutes, thanked Jesus for creating me to be a knucklehead and swam back in with the tide.
Using my hoodie to dry off and as a cover I managed to put myself back together, and headed back to my starting point. Few times in my life have I felt so free, so able to conquer anything and there have been few times that I truly felt so deeply loved by Jesus. From being willing to document my dream to diving into the Med, today was a pivotal moment in my life; I hope to approach every situation with as much recklessness, freedom and willingness to be undignified as I did today!
One of my best friends in the whole world, Danny Jones, has a tattoo that reads, “No Reserves No Retreats No Regrets”, it wasn’t until today that I understood the true meaning behind this wonderfully liberating montra. I challenge you to do something absolutely crazy within the next week… something that you know is a little [or a lot] out of your comfort zone, even if people wouldn’t think so. Dang… I want you to live the life you dream of. Pursue it; He’s pursuing you.