There seem to be numerous ideas, spiritually, intellectually and psychologically as to how and why we react. Theory after theory tries to explain what would lead us to one action over another and while some of the theories make complete sense, I want to challenge this entire concept.
Intellectuals may say that they make a decision because it is the most logical decision to make. Psychologists may make a claim that a decision is made due to the experiences one has endured. Theologians [or spiritual scholars] may say that we act solely based on spiritual influence, either by God or Satan [or just an idea of good and evil depending on the spiritual belief]. While each of these very basic and broad ideas make sense and ultimately play a role in the “why” behind our actions, above and beyond all theories our actions boil down to our desires.
You see, we do what we want.
Now, some of you may think, “I do things I don’t “want” to do, all of the time”. Prove it… You may not want to go to work, but you want a paycheck to provide shelter, food, clothing and stuff, therefore you work because if you didn’t you wouldn’t have those things you want. Some may say, “I have experienced emotional, psychological or spiritual trauma that leads me to act/respond this way”. If you were truly unhappy with the way that these experiences made you respond, you would seek the appropriate therapy in order to rewrite the movement of your actions. So, ultimately you want to remain where you are, even if it is dissatisfying and damaging, because if you truly wanted to learn how to respond differently or heal so that you could, you would seek that. Lastly [for the sake of this not turning into a book], some may say, “I am doing what God wants me to do” or, “the devil made me do it”. Truthfully, however, if you are doing what “God wants you to do” then whether or not the decision is what you desired, it is obvious that you wanted to be obedient! On the other side of that, one of the writers of the New Testament says these words, “For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.” This statement seems very contrary to the point that I am making, however, if we are honest about our actions then we know that in the moment in which we “did what we did not want to do”, what we truly wanted was to obey the sinful nature that we have been given the strength to run from and we did not want to live in obedience to the heart that God is redeeming.
We do what we want, the good, the bad and the lethargic. If you don’t like it, change it.
This comes from a desperate heart to no longer blame anyone else or anything else for my actions, rather to take full responsibility for my life, my movements, my relationships and ultimately my future. Pray for me as I attempt to rewrite the course of my actions, repave my patterns and live the way my heart “desires”, because I want to.
Thank you for hanging out with me for a few minutes!